A few weeks back, when I was teaching at The City Quilter, my Man hatched a plan. While I was away, he measured, he double checked and he took meticulous notes. When he came to pick me up and help me get home he was so excited he could barely contain himself. He asked if he should tell me or wait. I said spill.

He'd measured the 1950's sofa, the bookcase, the Chinese alter cabinet, they would all fit. He'd found some feathers and wanted to make a nest, a love nest. There was a new and bigger TV coming, a Wii to keep us entertained and amused. And a need to draw in and take care.

This lovely, loving room used to be my sewing room, but now, we call it the Love Nest.

And don't worry. my sewing space, although a mess currently, will be well contained in our main living space. Space is to be used and well, you know. Photos coming soon.

I am amazed by your support and generosity. Amazed. Thank you so much for supporting me with comments, cards, soft hats, hand dyed scarves, hippo toys, tea, magnets, ribbon pins, goofy hats, pink ribbon stoles, stuffed birds, and all you are. It's just plain Love.

I am sorry that I cannot send thank you notes to each and every one of you. I really am trying to focus my energy on healing first and art making second. I also have a Man who I needs love and affection too.

Someone even honors my Arrowcat who can sniff through any box, knowing the presense of good is inside...

And if any of you follow me personally on facebook (where I will give short updates as to my health and personal life), you will know that I think BUGS should be my totem creature right now. They are resilient, long standing and indefatigable. Traits I want to embrace.

Wish me luck today.

Much love right back to you.

This is a photo of myself in younger days and my Grandma Testa. I think maybe this was around 1996 or so. It was Christmas Eve. My Man had bought me the sweater I was wearing.

I don't remember who took the photo. What I do remember is that when asked to take the photo with me, my Grandmother got so happy, she stretched her arm around me neck, squeezed me to her and we are beaming. Here is the proof.

My grandmother was a strong beautiful, independent woman. Here are some words you might bandy about on her behalf, piece worker, mother, sister, bootlegger's wife, a cook, a love, my personal saint of all things sewing. She bought me my first sewing machine and marveled at my ability to read a pattern.

Where my Grandma Creamer was a soft bundle of Grandmotherly love and affection, Grandma Testa was a, 'give me that lollipop, sit down and shut up.' kinda gal.

She stands with me now, I can feel her.

With my breast cancer diagnosis came a shift in my perception of self, what is important and 'the bottom line'. Life, those I love, my feline person, my art, all important stuff. Hair, will grow back. They told me this would be the week my hair fell out and they were right. My Man shaved what hair I had yesterday morning. It was a relief really, much better than watching it fall.

And if any of you have been reading for a while, you will have ascertained that quick sketching is not something I embrace, rather, I like studied portraits, in depth explorations of shape and proper proportion. So why not make quick self portraits part of my daily routine? Quick gestures that capture this new emergence of self and self image?

Done deal. The Butter Box Book seems a great repository for this!

Gwen Diehn is a megasuperstar journaler, book artist and author. She has just started a blog in honor of her latest book, Real Life Journals. One of the first things she did, as any good blogger should, was to post a tutorial.

I am happy to say that Gwen is a friend too. She visits New York City on a regular basis and meets up with my Journal Study Group. I was able to see her Butter Box Book (the afore mentioned tutorial) in person and in action. Needless to say, I was smitten, even down to purchasing the same butter. Though I have to say if my favorite goat milk butter came in a box, I would have preferred that.

My Butter Box Book will be a jot book, will have some quick illustrations, will also have life stories, emotional content and daily entries. I am giving myself full permission to use this book. I made it in less than a day! Go make one for yourself!

And, of course, yesterday an important Valentine had to be acknowledged. My Man really is a Champ. He is the Champion of my heart.

Yesterday I taught at The City Quilter in NYC, it was great fun, the students were enthusiastic and we made some great stuff.

I was very excited to hear that there was a wait list for the class, and they have stated they would like to have another class (or two) in August.

Shirley was my helper through the class. And although she thought this piece was chaotic, it washed up really well. Too bad I didn't get an 'after' photo. Maybe she will email me one?

Joan was please as punch and a great student too.

I loved the way Kathleen applied the paint to the cloth, her pieces sort of glowed. I will have a to try making a few pieces in her style. Students teach as much as learn, that is what I love most about the whole exchange.

Yesterday I taught at The City Quilter in NYC, it was great fun, the students were enthusiastic and we made some great stuff.

I was very excited to hear that there was a wait list for the class, and they have stated they would like to have another class (or two) in August.

Shirley was my helper through the class. And although she thought this piece was chaotic, it washed up really well. Too bad I didn't get an 'after' photo. Maybe she will email me one?

Joan was please as punch and a great student too.

I loved the way Kathleen applied the paint to the cloth, her pieces sort of glowed. I will have a to try making a few pieces in her style. Students teach as much as learn, that is what I love most about the whole exchange.

Sometimes I glance over at the Cat Man and see his true essence, better still, I sometimes catch it in photo.

Today I go to The City Quilter and teach a full house Soy Wax Batik with Paint. Dale and Cathy, the owners of the shop are the most savvy quilt store owners I have ever met, great folk those two. And great shop, it is a must stop for anyone visiting New York City. I will bring back photos.

I have a secret, I need to be cagey about it. I have been being creative and doing work. But... That is all I can say about that.

I just received a telephone call from the nurse practitioner who 'saved my life'. I'd gone to her office last October wondering about some lumpiness. She told me to get a mammogram and then see a specialist. I got the mammogram and was told all looked fine, I hesitated to call a specialist thinking I would be wasting their time. The nurse practitioner called me, on my cell, twice. She asked me to follow up with a specialist and told me the exact words to say when I made the appointment. I called and made the appointment to appease her.

After my diagnosis, I wrote her a thank you note. I thanked her for calling me and pushing me to follow through.

Over the phone she deflected my thanks, redirected it to my own need to know and was quite humble. I don't care. She is my angel. And I am not the angel sort, that is a bit fru-fru for my taste. But now, I have an angel.

So, I have gone and done it. I wrote back.

And I drew back. Though I have to say, I envision this drawing to be a bit less beef-centric.

Yesterday I received a package from Leslie. And I sat in a heap with my friend Cricket, opening, tearing up and remaining in awe. Thank you. I am sorry that I can't write each of you personally, my energy level doesn't quite permit it. I can say though that I feel honored. And touched.

I think I am being asked to accept the love and care of a larger world. I know that I give and happily. I want you to feel enabled to make, to do, to draw, sew, paint. I want you to embrace the hurts of entering shows and getting rejected only to buck up and and fly straight into the wind again. I mean, we are artists, right? And this is the job, and it is wondrous and fun. And we each have something to say. Our skills may be well developed or burgeoning and new, but there is a place for each of us. I have always felt that as a teacher, as someone who has logged some hours, it is my job to help you see the path, break the steps into manageable pieces and decide which one to take first. And I do this gladly. We all do.

But now, I have been handed a health challenge that I cannot refute. I must act. And I am ever grateful to have you at my back. In this care package, goofy hats, warm socks, loving words, head wraps, buff headbands, an itunes card, music, a fiber postcard. My goodness. I will see myself through this. I will learn to bitch a little, and I will, of course, keep cracking the creative whip.

Last week my friend Shanna passed me this letter. She found it outside Dick Blick in Soho, Manhattan.

It is a love letter.

It asks to to write back and to draw back. The drawing enclosed in the letter is half finished and reminds me of a bacon cheeseburger with a side of something.

Should I write back?

Here are some more clues: click.

Here is the web site for the project.

hmmm.

These are my current comforts. The objects I want nearby and on my person. A troll bead bracelet that I wear in common with my beautiful mother, A silver gentle cuff that she slipped on my wrist on Christmas eve night.

My Grandmother Testa's beautiful diamond earrings.

A cowl, knit with love and care by Cricket.

A stainless steel bracelet with private and strengthening meaning given by my Man.

Comfort all.